When parents split up it can be really hard to make sense of how we are feeling and often we are not able to make sense of the feelings that we are having. 

Your feelings will vary depending on what has happened in the past and what you hope for in the future. 

You might feel, happy, sad, worried, excited, optimistic, and lonely all at once. This is normal, so much is changing in your life. 

When your parents separate, you may experience a range of emotions, depending on your age, personality, and the circumstances surrounding the separation. Common emotions that you may feel could include:

1. Sadness:

You may feel sad when your parents separate, especially if you are used to living with both parents and suddenly must adjust to living with just one.

2. Anger:

You may feel angry that your parents are separating and may direct this anger toward one or both parents.

3. Confusion:

It is normal to feel confused about why your parents are separating, especially if you do not fully understand the reasons behind the separation.

4. Anxiety:

Children and young people commonly feel anxious about the future, especially if you are uncertain about where you will live or how your life might change after the separation.

5. Guilt:

Guilt about the parents’ separation is also a common emotion, especially if you believe that you played a role in the separation. It is important that you try to remember that regardless of the circumstances you are never to blame.

Thinking about talking?

It is a great idea to seek out a trusted adult to provide emotional support during and after a separation. These people may be able to help by listening to your feelings, providing reassurance that you are still loved, and helping you to adjust to any changes that occur as a result of the separation.

More Information about Difficult Feelings and Emotions.

The following video clip provides a range of smaller clips about anxiety. This might help you to make sense of some of the feelings that you are having, and maybe even begin to think about how you might cope with these.

Safe and confidential support.

If you need help and support it is important to know that Childline (and Meic if you live in Wales) provide a safe place to talk about the things that might be happening for you. The Childline and Meic websites also have a range of great information about anxiety and managing this.